*Silence Pain*

I lied on the bed, staring at the ceiling blankly. Could'nt bother to blink my eyes. My mind echoeing what she said to me. I thought we were friends, one of my best of friends........
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I closed my eyes, allowing my mind rushing through all the memories we had together, all the things we shared, bitter or sweet. I woke up and leaned lightly against the window spotting two little kids playing happily, reflecting what we used to be. My lips curled into a smile. We used to be like that together, everytime together.....always. Who knows time would change a person in such a drastic manner? She had her new friends and I have been shoved aside. Whenever I'm with her, i will just be a shadow or sometimes I'm invisible. It took me long enough to realize that there is distance between us with an invisible wall parting it......
Its dusk now. The evening sky was beautiful painted in golden orange colour. The sun shone gently on the land producing a perfectly warming scenery. Breathing in the sweet scent of the breeze deeply, somehow it soothed me. I felt better.
I know words are sharper than weapons, but i never tasted it until then. Who knows a few sentences hurt so much? It was like a blunt weapon stabbing right into my heart, giving a slow torturous throbbing pain. It had left a scar there, marking it as disappointment.......betrayal. I trusted her too much, believing her that she would never hurt me, physically or emotionally. And yet, she hurt my feelings. My mind flashed to the moment, when she smiled at me curtly while spitting out those hurtfull sentences. I was not sure she did it intentionally or unintentionaly but the damage is done...... Nothing could change it.
I heard giggles. My eyes rested on the two little kids. They waved at me, i nodded and smiled lightly. If our friendship was as pure as theirs, I thought.
I looked up to the sky again, taking one last view of the scenery before I get back to my work. I know, everything will never be the same again,never.....
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I forgive but not forget......


Ja Ne~

* A New Year, A New Hope, A New Life *

Ooohhhhh!!!! Its school time again..Weeeeeee =)
STPM here I come!!!(growl*)LOL!!
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Haih... This year i remained in the same class with Kim,Angela,Suan eng ( pity me...... =P) and soo peng them. Aiks..Juey's not same class with me anymore and im kinda like cant get used to it <,< ( Note* no side thinking please=.= tired of u guys' babbling). You know, absence do really make heart grew fonder. Last year i never appreciate the existance of Juey (come hit me la noob =P) and now.....i mean, HELLO, things change. I cant laugh like i did last year, those ROFL and LOL. I mean, she always laugh with me and it did not look silly when two people doing it. And imagine, you laugh like hell there alone and im sure everybody will like >.> you.. Its like ''MuahahHAHAhahaha...ahemmmmm (cough*) hemmm...hmmm... then -_-''' ''
Aiks...she always used to do stuff for me and im kinda getting dependent on her ( you know what =Pwant me to list out?)and now i have no one to help me =( *sob,sob*. I think i really relied on her..way too relied on her.... Dont want to admit it but kinda miss her......
Argghhh...and You-Know-Who is so annoyingly annoying and its getting on my nerve each day (duhh..its only 3 days...) YEA 3 DAYS and it is already tiring. Gosh how am i goin to carry myself for the rest of the year???.. sigh..pity myself. Damnit Juey, you're in other class now and i have to bear all the unwanted-disgusting-nonsense thingy from You-Know-Who.
Well, my class is quite fine but it seems its seperated into groups -_- not that united as last year's =/. Maybe things will get better soon. Ms Wee said a class with students who are cooperative often do better during exam and i strongly believe it =). Ooh and, Aung Swee Peng teaches us Chemistry and im glad that she is my form teacher again =D. She's such a nice teacher. And of course i missed my last year's math teacher :(, was hoping that she would teach me again..oh well...what is mine is mine. Destiny.....<.<

*Breathe in deeply*
Okay, in this new year i have to work harder and must not let HER look down on me. Hmmph!! no one look down on me unless he/she is taller than me!!!!! =P (all come hit me la...lalala~)<,<
I realise how much i have missed out last year and really have to buckle down to achieve my goal. (ahhh~ doctor~im waiting....know what i mean? LOL!!!) *chuckle*
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what??!!


Ja Ne~