*Off Day of Another*

*This is the exactly same text I copy from my phones LifeBlog..sorry for some grammar mistakes..wrote it there and then*

So tired now..exhausted..de car broke down wif steam coming out from de front boot n green fluid leaking out..gross..i kinda worry that the car might explode..i quickly run out of the car n grab my mobile phone behind the car seat..then i realize my phone is out of credit..urgh..what a day.. I stand at the roadside then an idea hit my mind..borrow phones from the motorist! luckily a kind middle-aged man agree to borrow me his mobile phone..i call my bro for help and he says he is coming..i thank the generous man sincerely and he left. While i was waiting for my bro..a muscular man stops nearby and offers help to me..he wants to help me to push my car aside..i reluctantly accept it..then that man asks me whether he can check what's wrong with my car..but i refuse.. I thanks him whole heartedly and he left.. I wait for about half and hour and received call from my bro saying that he just reached our machanic's place and i was like right..another quarter hour to go.....
*end LifeBlog*

So what happened next?
Well...nothing much..not a big deal..is just that 3 vehicles met accident because of me....a motorist was busy looking at my car and he crashed into a white proton wira, right after one second or two, another motor came crashing into the motorist and the white proton wira..worsening the accident......the bumper was like broke into two pieces and I could see clear cleavage on the car boot. The first motorist hurt his legs and arms and the second motorist hurt his legs... Then I saw the three victims looked at me suddenly and i quickly turned away fearing that they may put the blame on me.....
finally my bro and the machanic came and I rushed home for my chem tuition.
thats all.....

Ja Ne~

*Foul-up*

I met an accident today and I was in the wrong side. I hit a Honda Jazz with my old Tiara..(well luckily its not new). The whole incident was my fault and Im truly deeply sorry and will be more aware next time plus the rest of my life time. After having a long thought, here's some of my mistakes done:
1) Wrong assumptions
»thinking that its green light and the vehicle is supposed to start moving
2) Do not aware that its a slope we are talking about
»why the hell I dont slam the brake faster?
3) Underestimate the power of tiredness
4) Mind wander elsewhere for one second or more
5) Accelarate too fast
6) Driving too fast in a road that I dont familier with

Yep. My mistakes. If I left out any mistakes, please kindly tell me =)
I would like to thanks all of my friends who were there with me during that incident. Here, I would like to express my graditude to you guys. Thanks for being there with me. You guys really helped me alot espeacially mentally. You guys spent almost 2 hours in that accident spot while my brother negotiated with the owner of the car. I really feel pai sei and really really appreciate all of you. Being there with me provided mental supports for me.By the way, Its not like I want to compare anything but Juey really helped me lots today. In one word, she helped me in everyway. WKYN=)

My vow:
DRIVE MORE CAREFULLY AND MIND DO NOT WANDER ELSEWHERE

Ja Ne~

*Alexander the Fifth*

*Sigh*...yes I've done it..but there was no sign of satisfication or joy in my heart. I've been waiting for the day to come and POOF...its over now. Well, if I had a choice I swear I would do no such thing.

...........

......

I gazed at him, yes, a him, breathing in deeply I told myself ''this is it, do it whether you like it or not''..... I held him, it was stil warm,comfortably warm... Sense of guilt hit me waves after waves. I swallowed hard. And so it began.........

................

........

.....

Five hours later, I patted his head lightly...rest in peace my little one.......I'll miss you.

Miss you...


Feelings, towards him....developed unconsiously in that five hours time..*sigh* I told myself he's dead but still, I dont feel like parting with him...perphaps a bond is formed between us...nawh. Thats quite impossible, what am i thinking? Well, it was his fate and I'm fated to do the job...nothing could change it.....

I looked at him fondly one last time before turned away...farewell my Alexander the Fifth........


Ja Ne~

*Frustrations*

What the??!! LOL!! I know im stupid but like below 50%?? Gosh...speechless. Oh well, nevermind..at least im smarter than 40% of others =P~~ Hmmm 151 of IQ..wonder its good or bad=\

Ahhh!!~Its been so long since I sign in Blogger..-.- then i finally decided some update must be done somehow and yep,im here...........(<.< *what??!!..lost in words......) Seriously, I got nothing to write =\..
Okay FINE!!!
Here's a message for YOU: Dont mess with me or i'll giv u a piece of my mind..so stay away from me!!Dont you ever feel tired saying those pointless empty sentences which contribute nothing but a waste of time listening to it? Its not like you cant say anything nice...its just..arghh..if u meant to say something to make other laugh, at least think before you open your mouth..They say anyone has sense of humour...i doubt it now... What you yourself think is funny, other might not think so. Your ridiculous sentences are testing my patience each day and getting steps closer to the limit.
Ooh and, please dont tell me or her and another her anything about your pathetic 'plans'. I or We have no interest in it. Tell it to other who cares... And and, I just cant believe you could have negative feelings towards that 'nice girl'. You did'nt say it out but we all know you ''bs''(=P) her. Hmmph!!
Okay...much much better~...
Im good =D


Ja Ne~

Tummy Yummy......Or Not

Booya~
After taking advice from the president of the counsellor of my school =P who happened to sit beside me, i realised that some content I wrote in mt previous blog may cause emotional disturbance to someone who is close to me =). Well, i would like to ''eat'' back what I said previously and never mention anything about the incident anymore if it would make you happy. Better now? =)

Btw, my tummy hurts =(..I think I have taken something that does'nt agree with me..... hmmm..what did i ate yesterday? Well...Hokkien mee for lunch..extra spicy curry and bread for tea.. dinner at Gor Tiao Lor, ordered malamian (FYI,it cost only rm4!!! Two huge prawn for you!! *warning* don't, I say don't, ever keep a prawn in your mouth......unless you want to know how is it like to keep a finger in your mouth...this is serious...). The next morning,which is today, took roti canai with curry poured all over on it for breakfast. Did i mention i ate curry mee for supper yesterday night?
I wonder how is my stomach's condition right now...no, I don't wanna know... Aiks...what i 'took in' yesterday, the consequences will be 'channeled out' today...or tomorrow.....

*Guilty Conscience*

I stood there, away from her. Watching her talked and laughed. I could not stop the sense of guilt came rushing and filling my heart,my stomach cramped; spreading to my lungs...almost suffocating me....I took in a deep sharp breath, trying to ease the uncomfortable feeling locked inside my heart and apparently it did not work. Guilty conscience-its all i could feel. Looking into her eyes now took my courages and strength.

It will never be the same again,never...

It was all my fault, purely. If it was not me, she will be fine... It was me who brought nothing but this misery to her.... I'm the only one to be blamed, I put myself at fault. I sighed deeply.

She told me it was not my fault and things which meant to erase the sense of guilt. I knew that more or less she would somehow blamed me for that incident. Well, the damage is done.......nothing could be done now.

There is no turning back..... I doubt whether things could be same again, like always.

I tilted my head and saw her walking towards me. I caught a glimpse of her eyes and swore i saw something in there.....disappointment? hurt? hatred? I do not wish to reveal. Swallowing hard, I plastered a smile on my face. She smiled back. My stomach cramped again, with guilt and regrets. I shook my head slightly, trying to get rid of this feeling, at least temporarily.
Maybe, if she put the blame on me, I would feel better. I would rather let her yell at my face for bringing her into this than smiling to me......

She treated me so well and yet what have i done to her? I dont deserve this. I dont deserve everything she had done for and to me, I dont.

Its too late to apologize......

Stealing a quick glance at her before she left, i made a mental note- be independant, no more troubles for her.

Perphaps, the best way is to keep a distance from her, for her afterall. I do not know...or just do not want to know..............

Ja Ne~

*Understanding*

I know your prowess and here i declare that I do not have any intention to win you or whatever it is.... You are so *censored*...*censored*

It hurts when you said something like that to me,do you realise that?perphaps not...I dont blame you. But please do not expect i could cope up exactly what you have about your prowess.
Please...be more understanding would you?
I have just achieved a little success and am trying to improve myself...how could you jz break my confidence like pulverizing an ant on the ground?
Im sick of you telling me what to do
Im sick of you looking down on me
Im sick of......

DAMN IT!!!!


Ja Ne~